no business like show business!

FB is only just beginning to import all of my previous blog entries in as notes; so now it looks like I've had a long dry spell and have suddenly decided to bubble over in an explosion of wordisms.

For the record, I am still normal, and am not bipolar.

Today was spent tech-running; and then we hung around onstage after everyone else had left school, at night.

Jerry Winterton lay down on the front proscenium and promptly declared he wanted "to live here". Hashisha started doing her "black chick" beatboxing impressions. Avis pirouetted. George was Michael Jacksoning around with a lampstand like it was a microphone. Jacko and I launched into various offkey renditions of Chicago! and I spun around on the table pretending to be Velma Kelly.

...I love this art.

I love it, I love it, I Love it.

It shines from my eyes like floodlights; my lungs strain with it; I leave my dirty knees and pitiful cobbled-together heart in the wings when I come and I leave wholly restored, full, perfect.

God saved my soul.

The theatre birthed it.

Oh, love.

When did you become so banal?

This post is dedicated to all the people out there on FB, who know they shouldn't be on FB but are on FB anyway, out of a lonely little desire to feel like in the midst of all of this, they're still connected! to something bigger.

... It makes me laugh, a little; to think that we're all out on here with virtually the same statuses "HELP" "FML" "AH STRESSED", "FFFFFML", etc; and all bonded in a weird Sense Of Solidarity.

Oh, it's good to be a 21st century teen!

I have been attempting to revise Balance of Payments for the past few hours or so.

I made a mindmap. Which was good. After that everything kind of died.

Whitby said colours help with memory retention, or some shizz. I say definitely some shizz. My notes are now just a general scrawl of orange, green, and yellow (trust me to pick the worst-coordinated colours, too) and are not any less confusing.

In a desperate, last-ditch attempt to Be Motivated; I am even listening to the HSM3 soundtrack. Josh's recommendation. Oddly, their songs're pretty motivational, actually; and besides, Efron has >>>>> street cred than Bieber...right?

Oh well. Productivity now, to make up for tomorrow. Because tomorrow is looking to be a purely Weekend-Weekend kind of day. The 'rents're flying off Down Under in the morning, I'm meeting Di to head to the American Club for a gym and catchup session, and then apparently Erik gets license to whisk me away during any part of my day, anywhere, in whatever I'm wearing.

NOT while I'm in the gym. If he does, I will hit him with the elliptical handbar.

Yesterday I wrote a song for Carol. I'm finally stepping out of the Hush Sound/Dido-sounding corner- I like writing Broadway songs now- it's fun to be able to be a little bit witty and a whole lot feisty and to not have to care about much at all.

I drove Mum up the wall last night trying to work out the chords- her on the piano, me singing insistently "no, not that one" "not that one either" "...no, no, no"

I realize that when I am tired, I can become a bit of a perfectionist. Too bad it only applies to my art and not my Econs revision.

...It all paid off, though; because today I gave Carol a little rendition at the back of the classroom, and she loved it and compared it to Cell Block Tango and I was all WHOABOI and immensely flattered, if highly skeptical, because Cell Block Tango is, like, the Great Expectations of jazz music- only with garters and black stockings.

... Bring on the weekend; I'm ready.

Riiiight after I snag these eight (...I know- eight! eight! What an extravagance) hours of sleep and enjoy my unproductive Saturday to the hilt.

I wish I had a season pass to Disney Land. I could study on the Flying Dumbo rides and when the mid-evening sleepies set in; I totally think a spin on Space Mountain would work way better than caffeine. Hell, Mickey Mouse DISCOVERED caffeine.

He also discovered sugar, weed, and Red Bull.

I want to see Pocahontas.

Night.

List Of Useless Things I Have Done Today Instead Of Studying:

1. Went on FB

2. Went swimming

3. Got tan

4. Also got ogled

5. Invented a creative way to survive in trees with a pulley system

6. Did the Oprah and doled out advice on matters of the heart

7. Been tempted to go on friend's crush's Wall and type "DOUCHE" and then Like it

8. Printed ukulele chords

9. Played ukulele chords

10. Tried to rearrange chords into song

11. Failed

12. Wrote own song

13. Forgot the tune

14. Discussed the correlation between homosexuality and white linen pants

...scheisser, I am so acing the A Levels.

Warning:

I am not feeling v coherent today; so if you are the kind of person who does well with linear graphs and bar charts and who actually uses a compass to draw circles, you probably would be better off not reading this.

Yesterday after my glorious swim (in which I turned about four shades copperer), it started to rain. More like bluster, actually- think Dorothy and Toto in Kansas.

Aaaand me being me; I decide it would be suitably liberating and poetic to hop around in the rain. So I do.

Aaaand me being me, I then proceed to spend the rest of the day falling sick.

Today's lie-in definitely helped, though. I slept from midnight to 10am- that now makes me the official Owner Of More 2010 Sleep Hours Than Every NJCian A-Leveller Combined.

And then I spent the rest of the day making Econs notes (before you get worried, Josh, I only did one chapter), rummaging through my mum's makeup box for loot, writing songs, drinking tea, emailing ex-lovers, and doing generally un-A-Levelly stuff.

Mum: "You emailed him? I thought you two were officially ex-communicado!"

Cara: "Yes, but I was feeling particularly forgiving today."

Later on... Mum: "You're definitely feeling very forgiving today. You even like Ellie."

Ellie, for the benefit of you who have not yet met my three deceptively doe-eyed nuisances- is my English cocker spaniel. I would like her better if she didn't jump around/yap at my friends/roll over for strangers/ransack the trash can so much.

... I wish I had a pet snake. Too bad that's, like, illegal here.

And speaking of animals.

...Back off my brother, you hyenas.

I will stand over him like a lioness and I will take down the first of you who dares to lay your dirty paw on him.

Take it out on me. Don't take it out on him- he is only just beginning to grow strong.

Aaaanyway.

I have to knuckle down to The Reality Of Life and stop living for the weekend so much. Although, tbh, at the rate I've been going, every day has been sort of semi-weekend. Which would be well and good in - say, Australia- ....but NOT. HERE. I will get eaten alive here.

Which is why- right after this blog post- I am going to go off and do my Normal Distribution Tutorial; while playing Our Lady Peace so I feel that much cooler. (which isn't much, but it helps)

And then maybe tonight, I'll continue work on my NAGC prose entry, because that'll probably the one thing I can make any headway on today. So maybe my As are unsecured, my future is uncertain, and my eyebrows look totally weird after what the eyebrow lady did to them. But at least there are brow pencils, and at least I still have Words.

...so I'll write.

I'll write a story that everybody already knows and say "this is a story about Love".

I'll give them the candlelight, the windows in a lonely city, the man, the woman, the wrong time, wrong place, right cliches.

And they will love it. They will rave. They will write me little memos saying how creative, how fresh, how ingenious...

but they don't know that I just dressed it up in pretty words. It's been staring them in the face all along; and that's what kills me, you fools, you pretenders- you think you've lived ten, twenty, fifty years and so you know all about Feelings and Emotions but you don't know nix.

Ultimate irony: I'm one of you.

...Okay, Cara, /endangst.

Think Happy Thoughts! I'm off to write my "story about love".