So this is my soulsister Toni Nicole Jackson, who is pretty much the most beautiful little girl in the world.

We share an affinity for eyeliner, a middle name, and an extra special connexion.

This picture sums up all the amazing glowing things I am feeling inside right now, in technicolour.

... i am so happy.

I never knew it was so easy to be this happy; never knew it was this easy to be so happy.

(and for the witty people just waaaiting for me to type "never knew it was this happy to be so easy"... NOT gonna happen!)

I am now sitting at the computer and it's nice and cold and my dog is lying contentedly at my feet and I am stroking him absently with one toe, because apparently he is dying of kidney failure so I'm making an effort to be nice.

the past few days have been pretty damn wonderful.

Not even in a very epic way- but I think just having the freedom to do Nothing, and not feel guilty about it, is liberating like nothing else.

today I was going to get pierced, but God made it rain.

so I stayed home, and got restless, and persuaded le Mamita to go out. We were supposed to go shopping for a printer and makeup, but we ended up going to the grocery store, chalking up a $300 bill, and then going home. I AM SO EDGY, I KNOW.

I actually love grocery stores, though. I think that's the one liiiittle bit of "domestic" in "domestic goddess" that God gave me. I like browsing aisles and shelves and carrying baskets. Whenever we have study dates at Venezia, I inevitably end up "taking breaks" and heading to the grocery store and coming back with something weird like apple cider vinegar or diet A&W or vanilla jello.

So maybe I will not be as doomed in married life as I previously thought.

I can do the shopping, and he can do the cooking.

...this is not me being feminist. This is me employing survival skills; because I know for a fact that if I cook- we will end up subsisting on things that were microwaved instead of cooked, diet coke, wheatgrass shots, and a lot of raw things. And then some alcohol to kill the pain.

The next few days are going to be loverly.

I also finally have monies, and no longer feel quite so helpless. I want to buy beautiful things: silk dresses and safari-printed wraps and bits of jewellery and leather and garters and old music and sunday brunches.

Tomorrow: Gymming with Di at the Am. Club, piercings, lunch, moseying down Chinatown, and then the whooooole day to lounge away until Lyn arrives at 5ish, and we start watching both instalments of the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.

Sunday: Tanning at Sentosa with Maxy, Tisha, and Amrit. Everyone else is either a) starting revision for A Levels, or b) a sun-phobe. Killjoys.

Monday: HOLIDAY

Tuesday: Pool party

Wednesday and beyond: ... who knows???

i know this feeling won't last forever.

it's like Alaska Young says in that one line: "...Pudge, what you must understand is that I am a deeply unhappy person" and it's true.

but for now, this feeling is wonderful.

and it is enough.